GMAT作文点评与分析(五).

　　在GMAT作文的备考过程中，考生需要在大量的练习中不断提升自己的逻辑思维能力和语言表达能力，并通过参照模板来改进GMAT作文的写作方式，以达到提高GMAT作文写作水平的目的。下面澳际留学就来为大家提供一些GMAT作文的点评以及范例。更多相关问题可咨询澳际留学在线专家，如果有任何意见和建议，也请联系我们。

The following appeared in a report presented for discussion at a meeting of the directors of a company that

　　manufactures parts for heavy machinery:

　　“The falling revenues that the company is experiencing coincide with delays in manufacturing. These delays, in turn,

　　are due in large part to poor planning in purchasing metals. Consider further that the manager of the department that

　　handles purchasing of raw materials has an excellent background in general business, psychology, and sociology,

　　but knows little about the properties of metals. The company should, therore, move the purchasing manager to the

　　sales department and bring in a scientist from the research division to be manager of the purchasing department.”

　　Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.

出国留学办理签证是必不可少的，而办理签证的过程亦难易简，从政策解析到递交材料，从申请签证到领取签证!《玩转留学签证》帮你顺利拿下各国签证！更有名校师哥师姐为你讲解牛校申请经验，《谁说申请高手没有秘密》赶紧来探秘一下吧！

　　逻辑漏洞：

　　1，causal oversimplification: Coincidence does not necessarily indicate causal relationship.生产延迟不一定是造成收入减低的原因。

　　2，gratuitous assumption: 没有证据证明采购计划不好是造成delay的原因，原文的假设不成立

　　3，gratuitous assumption：就算前面的都成立了，采购部的经理也不一定就要调走，因为没有证据说明采购部经理就不需要general business, psychology, and sociology方面的知识， 而一定要了解metal方面的至少

　　Sample：

　　In response to a coincidence between fallingrevenues and delays in manufacturing, the report recommends replacing themanager of the purchasing department. The grounds for this action are twofold. First, the delays are traced to poorplanning in purchasing metals. Second, the purchasing manager’s lack ofknowledge of the properties of metals is thought to be the cause of the poorplanning. It is further recommended that the position of the purchasing managerbe filled by a scientist from the research division and that the currentpurchasing manager be reassigned to the sales department. In support of thislatter recommendation, the report states that the current purchasing manager’sbackground in general business, psychology, and sociology equip him for thisnew assignment. The recommendations advanced in the report are questionable fortwo reasons.

　　To begin with, the report fails to establisha causal connection between the fallingrevenues of the company and the delays in manufacturing. The mere fact thatfalling revenues coincide with delays in manufacturing is insufficient toconclude that the delays caused the decline in revenue. Without compelling evidence to support the causal connectionbetween these two events, the report’s recommendations are not worthy of consideration.

　　Second, a central assumption of the report isthat knowledge of the properties of metals is necessary for planning inpurchasing metals. No evidence is stated in the report to support this crucialassumption. Moreover, it is not obvious that such knowledge would be requiredto perform this task. Since planning is essentially a logistical function, it is doubtful that in-depth knowledge of the properties of metalswould be helpful in accomplishing this task.

　　In conclusion, this is a weak argument. Tostrengthen the recommendation that the manager of the purchasing department bereplaced, the author would have to demonstrate that the falling revenues were aresult of the delays in manufacturing. Additionally, the author would have toshow that knowledge of the properties of metals is a prerequisite for planning in purchasing metals.

以上就是澳际留学小编为大家提供的GMAT作文点评与范例，大家可以参考一下。不管技巧多好，GMAT作文还是要写，要练的，适当的背背模板也是十分重要的。

　相关链接：

1.二战GMAT 760分考生谈GMAT作文

2.GMAT考试成功感言：关于作文

3.GMAT作文点评与分析(四)