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36.(1次)
原始寂静:
V1(BY: rebechy ) “personnel director说公司里的最重要的问题(交流问题)已经解决”
原题:
The following appeared in a memorandum from the director of human resources to the executive officers of Company X:
“Last year, we surveyed our employees on improvements needed at Company X by having them rank, in order of importance, the issues presented in a list of possible improvements. Improved communications between employees and management was consistently ranked as the issue of highest importance by the employees who responded to the survey. As you know, we have since instituted regular communications sessions conducted by high-level management, which the employees can attend on a voluntary basis. Therore, it is likely that most employees at Company X now feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been made.”
人力资源经理给X公司的经营主管的备忘录:
去年,我们向员工调查他们认为X公司应该进行的改进,让他们把改进按重要性排列。结果列印为一张可能的改进的表格。根据调查中员工的反应,“加强员工和管理层的沟通”最具重要性,稳居调查表之首。如你所知,那以后我们建立了由高层管理人员组织,雇员可以自愿参加的常规交流会。因此,看来X的多数员工认为最应该进行的改进已经完成了。
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参考思路:
1.The result of a last year&aposs survey does not necessarily represent the improvement most needed of this year.
2.How was the survey held has not been illustrated by the author, thus making the conclusion groundless.
3.Whether the implement of the mentioned resolution is right or wrong is still unkonwn, it is still too early to say the improvement has been made.
4.调查的可信性:是否anonymous,如果要named,很可能并不是他们最想要的改进。
5.改进方法是否充分?是否交流会有很好交流,并且采纳accept意见
参考范文:
The Director of Human Resources concludes that most employees at Company X feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been satisfactorily addressed. Two reasons are offered in support of this conclusion. First, a survey of employees showed that the issue respondents were most concerned about was employee-management communication. Second, the company has since instituted regular voluntary sessions for employees and management designed to improve communication. The director’s argument is questionable for two reasons.
To begin with, the validity of the survey is doubtful. Lacking information about the number of employees surveyed and the number of respondents, it is impossible to assess the validity of the results. For example, if 200 employees were surveyed but only two responded, the conclusion that most of the employees ranked employee-management communication as the most pressing issue would be highly suspect. Because the argument offers no evidence that would rule out interpretations such as this, the survey results are insufficient to support the author’s conclusion.
Furthermore, even if the survey accurately ranks certain issues according to level of employee concern, the highest-ranked issue in the survey might not be the issue about which employees are most concerned. Why? The improvement most needed from the point of view of the employees might not have appeared as one of the choices on the survey. For example, if the list of improvements presented on the survey was created by management rather than by the employees, then the issues of greatest concern to the employees might not be included on the list. Lacking information about how the survey was prepared, it is impossible to assess its reliability. Consequently, any conclusion based on it is highly questionable.
In conclusion, the director’s conclusion is not well-founded. To strengthen the argument, additional information regarding the way in which the employee survey was prepared and conducted is required.
相关链接:
1.GMAT考试成功法则之作文篇
2.GMAT作文点评与分析(五)
3.GMAT作文模板汇总
Amy GUO 经验: 16年 案例:4272 擅长:美国,澳洲,亚洲,欧洲
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