雅思写作真题练习如何修改？.

　　雅思写作真题练习是整个写作备考过程中的“主旋律”，对于剑桥雅思系列中的真题的使用，一般也是实战演练的练习，通过练习去熟悉各种类型话题的思路以及论点、论据等等，但是在雅思写作真题练习的时候要注意一点，不是自己写一遍就完了，而是要对自己雅思写作真题练习的作文反复的修改，自己去找自己的错误，只有这样雅思写作真题练习才能提高的更快、更有效果。

　　Topic: In many countries people no longer wear their national costumes. They are forgetting their history and traditions, more people should be encouraged to wear their national costumes everyday. Do you agree or disagree.

　　原文：

　　In this day and age, as a pace of social development, a various kinds of clothes are winning tremendous popularity in some countries. But in the meantime, it has drawn a great deal of attention to the problem that whether more people should be encouraged to wear national clothes everyday. As far as I am concerned, people should not wear them per day.

　　In the first place, it is generally acknowledge that traditional clothes of some countries are unconvenient for national residents to work. It is a fact that some of their costumes, such as kimono of Japan,cheongsam of china and Korea-style cothes, they are too long and big to work. In particular policemen and doctors,these careers are hard to be done if they are wearing such clothes.

　　In the second place, not wearing national costumes doesnot mean their citizens forgetting their history and traditions. Some countries’ history and traditions are still studied by young children. Take Japanese as an example, they always knee down when they are eating meals.

　　Finally, clothes should be kept abreast with step of social development. The style of clothes can mirror the custom in a period of time in a country. Dr. Wang who especialize in sociey assessment supported this view in a paper. And he said that people living in this fast-pace society should wear neat clothes which are conveninet when they are working.

　　To sum up, I completely disagree with wiew that people wear the national clothes everyday in the current society. In my opinion, with amount of colthes into our lives,our daily lives should be colorful and fashionable.

　　点评：

　　1.原文开头模板痕迹比较明显，而且未能将背景信息交代清楚。应该按照课上所讲审题步骤理清文章的习作思路：即，BI(Background information)+WT(writing tasks)。因此，首段应该交代好背景信息和自己的观点(已交代)。

　　2.原文中部分句子之间的Cohesion出现问题。如， “Some countries’ history and traditions are still studied by young children.” 是对上句的佐证，需加入对比联系词in fact/ on the contrary

　　3.文章多次出现单词拼写错误，希望引起足够重视。

　　4.文章最后可以在分析不必要性之后，提出消除人们担心的办法。

　　修改：

　　In this day and age, with the pace of social development, clothes with various styles are winning tremendous popularity in some countries, where national costumes, on the contrary, are not as fashionable as bore. Consequently, some people advocate that more people should wear them every day. However, as far as I am concerned, it is unnecessary for everyone to wear those clothes each day.

　　In the first place, it is generally acknowledge that traditional clothes of some countries are inconvenient for national residents to wear in work time. It is a fact that some of their costumes, such as kimono of Japan, cheongsam of china and Korea-style clothes, are too long and big to work. Take policemen and doctors as an example, apparently enough, individuals in these fields can hardly carry out their daily work if wearing such clothes. Actually, there are numerous illustrations like this.

　　In the second place, not wearing national costumes does not mean that citizens are forgetting their history and traditions. In fact, in shcools the countries’ history is still studied, meanwhile traditions are inherited by the young generations. For instance, in Japan, people, whether the aged or the young, always knee down when eating meals, which has been regarded as one of the traditional customes.

　　Finally, clothes should be kept abreast with the step of social development. The style of clothes can mirror the custom in a period of time in a country. Dr. Wang, a well-known scholar who specializes in society assessment, supportes this view in his paper. And he claims that people living in this fast-pace society should wear neat clothes, which are convenient when working.

　　To sum up, I completely disagree with the view that people should wear the national clothes every day in current society. In my opinion, with various clothes of different styles coming into our lives, national costumes can be enriched or developed to a new scale. Additionally, to avoid the extinction of traditions, people should be encouraged to wear their national costumes in leisure time and during the traditional festivals.

　　通过上面修改前和修改后的雅思写作真题练习就能看出，练习写作之后的修改是很重要的一环，只有这样雅思写作真题练习才能达到更好的效果，这就好比一面镜子，通过修改后就能更多的提高自己雅思写作的结构、逻辑、用词、句型。